Will You Accept Me?

This post is about a free, anonymous tool that I made for checking to see if it’s safe to come out to someone.

Today is Coming Out Day. While I didn’t come out on this day, I did see a post from my sister last year saying that she was a safe person to come out to. Having lived in the closet my whole life, that was a remarkable revelation for me. I came out to her a non-binary a few months later, and she accepted me for the complex, wonderful person that I am. I am so thankful!

But I know not everyone has the opportunity to find that out through voluntary admission from the people in our lives. I know that some people keep their beliefs on the topics of gender and orientation very private, so it can be difficult to judge whether the risk of coming out to them will go well or poorly. I struggled with this for many years, and if my sister hadn’t made her announcement, I would likely still be struggling. So I set out to solve that problem, or at least put a little dent in it.

I made a website that allows anyone to send a message to anyone else, asking if they would be supportive of an LGBTQIA+ person in their life, and allowing for them to respond yes or no. It’s entirely anonymous. The recipient of the message has no way of knowing who sent it, and the server keeps no logs of email addresses or IPs. It uses the same encryption technology that banks use to protect financial transactions. And it’s available for free, 24 hours a day.

So if you’re like I was, afraid of how people might respond to you, afraid to even touch on the subject for fear of rejection, then I hope this tool is useful. I made it for you. And if you’re not ready to come out yet, that’s ok too. Make the decision that is safe and right for you. Just know that this tool is here, if you need it.